Wednesday, January 29, 2014

When I Grow Up...

Girl Between the Lines Link up

This week I'm participating in what's called a "link-up". In the blogging world this is a term used when authors write similar content & then share it with one another on the site that the link-up is being hosted. I've submitted content to other link-ups in the past, but this is the first time I'm writing based off of a particular prompt. The reason for doing this is mostly for networking purposes - and I've already met some pretty amazing people so far! This week's link-up is hosted by Hayley and Lauren, both gals who are young marrieds like me & write similar content. They've encouraged me so much already in my own writing & marriage!

This week's prompt is:

We all imagined what our lives would be like when we were "grown up"...how does that compare to what your life looks like now??


My life is both exactly how I pictured it would be....and also not.

I pictured myself getting married young...but could have never prepared enough for the life I have down here. Everything is so different in the South than it is back home. Marriage is work, but it's also much more wonderful than I had originally envisioned.

I pictured myself growing in Christ...but I was not expecting all the highs & the lows of living a life surrendered to Him. I thought it would be easy & constant. I'm actually being stretched every day!

I thought when I grew up, I wouldn't be so tired all the time. But now, no amount of coffee ever seems to do the trick. Good grief.

I thought when I grew up I'd be a perfectly gracious individual, never resorting to cynicism or a bad attitude. I didn't realize how difficult this would be. 

I had plans to go to Liberty University & study Communications w/ a minor in Christian Counseling; then go to Southwestern University and get a Masters in Biblical Counseling; then travel Europe as a missionary to local churches...all while learning Dutch, teaching discipleship groups to young girls, memorizing the book of Ephesians, cooking elaborate and delicious food, & being devoted to daily Scripture reading.

...yeah, I laughed after reading that too. I obviously have done none of those things. 

All this goes to show that "the heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." (Prov. 16:9)

I can set out to be successful & accomplish whatever it is that my heart sets out to do, but I always need to be prepared for God to change these things. 

When I was younger I had an idealist view of my life: I would be wealthy, successful, beautiful, charming, gracious, Godly, always saying the right thing at the right time, and never struggling with exhaustion or self-esteem or weight or motivation. I somehow thought that once I reached a certain age I would transform into SuperBeka. 

My life has actually been quite the opposite of all I thought it would be, but that doesn't mean I've failed. It doesn't mean God has forsaken me. In those times I've been faithless, HE has been faithful (2 Tim. 2:13).

He HAS grown me...in different ways than I thought. He HAS given me great opportunities...in different areas than I had anticipated. He HAS conquered sins in my life...those that younger Beka didn't feel the need to repent from.

While my life now does not compare to how I envisioned it to be when I was younger...I'm glad. 

I didn't want to be SuperBeka anyway.

I'm learning to embrace the season of life I'm in & trust that the Lord is growing me in it. 

I am nothing, but because of Christ, I AM redeemed.


10 comments:

  1. Nice to meet you by way of The Girl Between the Lines! I have enjoyed poking around your area of the internet. Loved your wedding pictures! I didn't personally go the CP route but I have several friends that did!

    Thanks for sharing your heart on this week's topic! Fun and encouraging!

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    1. Hey there! Thanks for the comment, and for visiting a little while! Yeah, CP was a HUGE part of my life, and I am completely in support of the method of schooling they promote. CP itself was a little much for me financially after awhile. But anyway. Looking forward to chatting more in the future!

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  2. Nice to "meet" you! I'm coming over from the link-up! Thanks for stoppin' by my little corner of the world! :)

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    1. You are most welcome! Thanks for stopping by as well! :)

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  3. By now, I should be either 1) in a dusty burka as a missionary in Afghanistan 2) published authoress of Christian young adult fiction or 3) an award-winning concert pianist (or at least a student in Julliard). Yes, and married. But heeeelllo, world of the realist.

    Great post. ;)

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    1. :) I love that, Naomi! You've been on your fair share of adventures, though!!

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  4. "I can set out to be successful & accomplish whatever it is that my heart sets out to do, but I always need to be prepared for God to change these things." ---LOVE that line! We often get so set in our ways that we are fighting God's will tooth and nail! It's so important to remain moldable and eager to be used by Him! Thanks for linking up!

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    1. Thanks for reading, Hayley! I'm looking forward to linking up in the future.

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  5. I absolutely loved this Beka, such a sweet post!! Thanks for sharing your heart AND sharing it with US!! :) The intro at the beginning was so sweet! So glad you joined us :):)

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    1. I'm glad to have joined as well! I think my favorite part was reading everyone else's posts! & thank you for your encouragement! :)

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